Mikey
had learnt he was adopted by accident – and in a most
hurtful way. Now, Social Services had become involved, and Mikey
had been taken into care.
For
the first part of this article, see the November issue - click
here
For the second part of this article, see the December issue
- click
here
For the third part of this article, see the January issue -
click
here
The
next months were very mixed for Mikey. In some ways he loved
the Assessment Centre. They had a little school there and, although
it was no challenge for him educationally, he got into the routine
of going every day and they had some activities and outings
that he liked. There was also a computer he enjoyed using when
he could. There were only a few other kids in the school and
no travelling backwards and forwards. Since there were staff
around at break times and lunch times a lot of the problems
were cut out.
But
Mikey still had problems relating to other people and to the
adults he liked, or he wanted to like him. Just when everything
was quiet, or serious, he would belch or fart, or make silly
faces. He would also play silly pranks, like putting Marmite
on the dark brown toilet seats, or putting cling film over them
and taking the light bulb out of the cubicle.
He
got a reputation with the kids for being a clown and with the
staff, especially the ancillary staff whom he tormented ruthlessly,
for being unpredictable and untrustworthy. This was the time
when some of his tricks started to be rather cruel and even
dangerous, while his behaviour got more wild when he wanted
approval and reassurance.
One
big problem was that the Assessment Centre was supposed to be
short term, and either the problems were solved, or a long-term
place was found. Usually the teachers got the kids back into
‘normal school’, or work experience or found some
way of filling the day.
The
care staff also either worked to get the kids back home, or
found them somewhere else to live. But Mikey could not be returned
to any of the schools and Mum and Dad still kept up the pretence
that there was no problem at home, other than his uncontrollable
behaviour. So where was he going to go and what was going to
happen to him?
Well,
one thing that was happening to him was that Jim, the guy in
charge at the Centre, soon latched on to his need to be loved.
He started grooming him - as I later learned to call it - a
reassuring hug here and an arm around his shoulders there, followed
by special treats and overlooking his bad behaviour. This made
it bad for him with the rest of the kids and the staff, as well
as being plain bad for Mikey. Of course, in a way it was just
what Mikey had always wanted: what he thought was unconditional
acceptance and plenty of tangible evidence that he was ‘special’
to somebody important in his life.
In
one of the dark times later on, when we were sitting in one
of the many squats where I found him, he told me that at first
he thought everything was OK. But the friendly attention from
Jim had rapidly turned to sexual abuse.
The
day after the first assault Mikey was a hell of a mess, both
physically and emotionally. He was rude and cheeky to everybody
and when the teacher rested a hand on his shoulder while she
bent to look at his work, as she so often did, the table, the
chair, the work and the teacher all got knocked all over the
place.
The care staff came into the classroom and bundled Mikey out,
so that later in the day when somebody noticed bruises on his
arms and neck it was assumed that he had got them in this ‘restraint’
and it was written up in the Violent Incident Report and put
on his file. Of course, nobody wrote up a report about Jim’s
violence, because it was a secret that only he and Mikey shared.
See
what happened to Mikey next in the next issue.
