It blew my mind…when she told me…you'd never believe how
much she's come through…it's changed my whole view of her…I
mean how could you experience that… and survive…?
As a 6
month old reaching for lights reflecting in Dad's glasses…as a
5 year old daring to run behind the enormous school bins…as an
8 year old exploring the old tip as if trespassing into another world…all
steps into the then unknown…and on from there through youth work
and teaching.
There's
a part of me which is constantly on a mission to explore brand new worlds
where no one's gone before…From cracking open stones which no-one
else has ever seen the inside of, to extracting rich brown waxy conkers
from their alien bright green shells. Doing crazy aerobics with townie
kids half way up a mountain in the fog…to stepping inside religious
buildings for the first time. From getting your eyes tested voluntarily
(when it might mean you've got to lose your cool and wear glasses) to
travelling off your estate to go and climb Snowdon. Or… daring
to act in a video…owning up to mistakes…coming back and
saying sorry…all firsts for someone at some point as they stretch
their wings and look beyond next door to further horizons.
The girl
in supported housing, scared, battered, misunderstood, grabbing her
self-esteem and heading for Uni. The lad with literacy issues, eyeballing
them, admitting Maths is not his greatest asset, but going on to do
what he can, and gaining paid employment to work with other youth who
also struggle with literacy. The stories are endless…
But it
takes a youth worker first who can see beyond a set of expectations
and regulations… who can then see a young person outside of boxes
- "vulnerable" " excluded" "APIR category 1".
It takes imagining - daring, teasing, believing…that it would
just be worth it to risk the experience. It might stretch the budget
and not be in the priority targets… but it would be so cool just
to be with them sweating, 'wingeing', ranting as they reach the top
of the hill only to be gob-smacked at the view… that would then
give them something to write home about…
But then
I guess there is always the inevitable risk factor. Always those who
drop out, after all the fundraising - and stay at the bottom of the
mountain…the drugs bust on camp… the fight at the away match
… rejection as the job gone for is lost to sight…and esteem
sinks back to the floor... risky business stretching the muscles…moving
off from comfort zones.
It makes
me think of swimming …such a milestone for so many - and of course,
always more refreshing if you swim more, talk less… But for many
of us the talking bit at least got you in there for the first time or
first 10 times…Those mad moments as you got past being blind as
a bat, spotty, overweight and embarrassed at "not being able to
swim at your age.." But then when you could swim...the exhilaration…the
relief…of fitting in and having a vague future hope of not drowning…it's
worth the endless hours of friends and workers cajoling …encouraging…and
being down right stubborn.
Finally,
as I mull this whole theme, it has to be said that broadening horizons
(and doing youthwork) surely have to be seen in the context of relationship…not
just a set of targets set with and for another for the sake of fulfilling
yet another's agenda…Youthwork has to be a journey towards the
horizon and it has to be shared…
The loss
of an unplanned baby to kids in the youth group… it takes more
than a set of appointments to sort things out for the parents. Whole
worldviews collide, collude, collapse and then re-gather- and that's
just for the youth-work team! And then there are things like the first
visit to a youth prison by a worker - weird feelings as you enter strange,
disconcerting new territory. Trying to neither feel guilty nor conspicuous…trying
to walk like you've done this a hundred times before…all new stuff
at some point…and you know, we need to sell the fact that it's
us who are learning too…we can't do this or that but maybe they
could teach us…we're scared at times...but we are mastering the
caravan in pitch-dark in the country because of all the good stuff which
happens if we do…
Whether
it’s addressing new concerns, revisiting old ones…stepping
out or being silent in your own company…daring ..sharing whatever
the horizons are for you or those you work with - they may be messy
risky and uncomfortable for sure…but do it …cos you're worth
it.
Ruth
Clay, with support from Energise, YFC and Worth Unlimited, just helped
to produce a mini-CD-ROM which explores faith-based community involvement
in Connexions - if you want a free copy (£1 for P&P) please
phone Frontier Youth Trust on 0121 687 3505.
